After twelve years of hosting travelers during the Fiestas de la Calle San Sebastián—and spending most of those years navigating the festival with increasing levels of sobriety myself—I've learned something crucial: you don't need a liter of rum to enjoy Puerto Rico's answer to Mardi Gras. You just need better strategy than the tourists (queer, straight, or otherwise undecided) stumbling down Calle San Sebastián at 2 AM looking for a bathroom that isn't being actively cleaned by an attendant who's clearly seen too much.
